It's officially 1:46 am, a solid three seasons of Sex and The City have been binged-watched in the past week or two, and I'm having dreams of becoming my own version of Carrie Bradshaw. All the glam, all the fashion, all the friends, and her beloved column featured for Manhattan's best. Or at least the best of the young, hopeless romantic New Yorkers who live their life through a color-by-numbers approach and cross their fingers that in twenty years the picture turns out pretty enough.
Okay, so I want to become Carrie. I want to live my life to its fullest capacity, love big, and write witty material that makes people feel like I am a friend at the dinner party. And maybe, once I live a little, I'll have an ounce or two of advice (but let's not get too wild). Let me rephrase this: I want to be the Carrie with a sex column, minus the sex part.
My only issue is what will replace that major component: the actual topic of my so-called "column" appearing in the now non-existent 1990s New York Times. I'm figuring that as long as I get the gears grinding and some words into this digital diary, the topic will find me. Adults like to say: kids these days, somehow they think things are just going to fall in our laps. Well, in this case, sign me up as your stereotypical naive 19-year-old who clearly doesn't have it figured out. [I'll be 19 in ten days, and I want to sound older. Just let this one slide, Mom.]
But, that's entirely the point. I don't have it figured out, nor should I. I'm too young to have my life together, but also feeling far too old to lack a little sense of purpose in my daily routine. Sure, making my own dinners and going for a daily run may feel like a band-aid of "adulthood," but we all know it's far more than that. It's time to start seeing what fuels my fire; what brings me fulfillment.
So, as ten minutes have passed [just shy of two in the morning], and I'm realizing I might have to postpone that 9 am workout to a noon yoga session, I think (I think?) I may have, sort of, reached full circle. I want to have my own column one day, so of course, that begins with an arbitrary blog post that no one will read today. I'll pretend like I have a loyal audience to make sure my personality stays afloat, but we all know this Wix page isn't quite reaching the top of your google searches with prestigious SEO. This arbitrary blog serves as my training wheels for what being a professional writer may someday be like.
And who knows, maybe I'll even figure out a topic to write about.
So long for now,
The girl who will one day be Carrie Bradshaw (without the cigarettes, Mom).
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